Forms of Database Torture (Illustrated)

Many forms of disasters can happen to a database. Here are three I’ve seen lately.

My Database Is On Fire

My Database Is On Fire

There's a reason they keep datacenters cool

My Database Has Been Hacked

My Database Has Been Hacked


My Database is Responding Erratically

Database Under Attack

"Is there Tuna in There?"

4 Responses to Forms of Database Torture (Illustrated)

  1. eccentricDBA March 19, 2012 at 11:12 am #

    Here I thought when the database was on fire it was a good thing.

    “We just moved all of our databases to Solid State Disks and now the Databases are on fire.”

    “Yeah, they are smoking.”

    • Kendra Little March 19, 2012 at 3:15 pm #

      That’s a good point. Smoking hot is good.

      You just want to avoid making the ceiling sprinklers go off.

  2. Robert L Davis March 19, 2012 at 3:32 pm #

    Excellent! here’s one: My Database is Bottlenecked

  3. Joe Celko March 20, 2012 at 9:10 pm #

    Where are “fragmented” and “denormalized” ?

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